Grieving
by 102000QP
Summary: When someone so close to you dies, how do you react? No character names are mentioned, who this story is about is in your own imagination.


"Yesterday we lost one of our own in a terrorist attack. My Love isn't the only one who didn't survive the attack. Dozens of people were killed, hurt and some are still on the brink of death. Dozens of people were and still are fighting for their life, some already lost the battle, others won and are alive and some will lose the hardest battle of their life in the next few days. The BAU lost an Agent, a friend and a confidant. Parents lost their child. A family will never be whole again. Children lost one or both their parents. Relationships are lost because one or both are not here anymore.

Every life lost is one too many. Today, hundreds of thousands of people are grieving; the world has once again been shaken to its core. Nothing is the same as before, there's a new place people can't feel totally safe again. Another place where people have been hurt, traumatized, have died and have to restart with their life. A person who was innocent, who did not deserve what faith brought them. A funeral will be held for someone who was far too young to die. A funeral for someone who was just starting with their life. A funeral for someone whose loss will be felt by dozens if not hundreds of people.

The BAU almost had the terrorist, but we weren't in time. We tried our hardest, everyone tries their hardest to stop another attack from happening. One second there were eight voices over the communication devices and the next, only seven voices remained, we, the ones left behind, were desperately searching for our lost comrade. When we found the person we were looking for, the soul was gone and only the body was left behind. The body of someone far too young to die.

At this moment there are no words to soften the loss of a person who was so dear to us, to you. The only thing we can do is survive. The survivors won't really live for a while, they will survive. They'll create a shield around them, to shield themselves from the other horrors happening in the world as they try to pick up the pieces and try to fit them into each other. Some pieces won't fit anymore, but will always be close in our hearts. New pieces will be created and together we'll find a way to go from the survival mode to the living mode. The hurt of the loss will never go away, but it will fade, very, very slowly.

Sometimes it will feel like we're losing them all over again. It will seem like the grieving process is starting again and it's in those moments that it's important to remember, No matter how dark the night will be, the sun will always shine again.

Sometimes we'll think, okay, we've survived for a couple months, we have shown you we can survive without you. It has been long enough, you can come back now, except for the fact that they can't, because of one decision made by one person who decided to actually go through with their action.

It's not fair, we've lost someone so dear to us, but the world still goes on. Right now, we want the world to stand still for a while, to think about everyone who was there, about everyone who has been in such a situation in their life. We want everyone to think about the people they lost; about how it's not fair that one person can do so much damage.

I've always been grateful for how close this team is, we are a family. This loss hurts more this way then if we would only be colleagues, but a great advantage is that I know that when I fall someone will be there to catch me.

I'm grateful for every memory I have, memories that are both in my heart and in my head. Memories that will never leave me. I know they fought for everything they were worth, but in the end, they lost the battle. I know that space will be made in my heart for people I still have to meet, but there will always be a spot that is yours and yours only.

My Love, I love you for always and eternity." I end my speech and I walk to my seat. I know I might have left some people guessing about why I didn't just talk about my Love, that's because my Love would want me to also speak about all those other victims and their families. When I sit down my right ear feels hot, just like it would feel when my Love would hug me from behind and breathe next to my ear. Right at that moment I know that no matter how alone I feel, my Love will always be with me.

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I left the names out of this story so you can decide for yourself who you want this to be about. I hope you all like it and if you have some time, feel free to leave a review.


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